Wednesday, April 28
Wednesday, April 21
i need someone supervising me, making sure i'm doing a good job with this little one. telling me when to take him to the doctor, what's wrong with him, why he has diaper rash, why his eye is gunky and he's coughing and snotty and cranky...... it's hard for me to spend the whole day being my own boss, making the decisions and hoping i'm doing what is best for him. i begin to doubt what i'm doing and how i'm doing it, worried i'm doing him a disservice or something that isn't the best for him. it's a life i'm in charge of now....it's intimidating
Thursday, April 8
my dear little monkey. you are the apple of my eye. i had no idea how much my life would change in the last four months. my life changed before you were even born, but it has changed so much more since then. you give me more joy, belly laughs and quiet tears in my eyes than anyone else. i could peek in your room and watch you sleep all day long. the twinkle in your eyes is so bright and innocent; your laughter is my new favorite sound. you are growing up too fast already, i want to slow you down. i love watching you figure things out, watching you watch your hands move, your face in a mirror, your feet kick around. you are learning and discovering every day and i love being with you to see it. however, i can't help but think about what your future holds. trying "real" food, rolling over, crawling, teething, walking, running, skinning your knees, jumping in mud puddles, talking, going to more baseball games with your daddy. i can't wait to watch you grow up and into the young man God has created you to be. my heart overflows with all the good things he has in store for you. just like the verse i painted over your crib, He knows the plans he has for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, to give you hope and a future." just as i've been watching you grow and mature over the past four months, i will continue to be there for you, every day. i will pick you up and snuggle you when you cry, i will wipe away your alligator tears, i will feed you, both the food that will nourish your body, as well as the food that will nourish your soul, i will hold your hand in public for as long as you'll let me, and always in my heart. you are a special little boy. i love you more than you know.