Thursday, October 11

lately

"there is nothing i am missing. i have everything i was supposed to have to experience the magnitude of this story, to dance wtih God." --don miller, through painted deserts

1 corinthians 7:29, the message
"i do want to point out, friends, that time is of the essence. there is no time to waste, so don't complicate your lives unnecessarily. keep it simple -- in marriage, grief, joy, whatever. even in ordinary things -- your daily routines of shopping, and so on. deal as sparingly as possible wtih the things the world thrusts on you. this world as you see it is on it's way out."

i need to simplify things. i need to slow down and enjoy the dance i am in with God. i need to simplify, get rid of, purge my life of things i don't need. not only in my "life", meaningless activities and time suckers. but also in my house, material things i thought i needed once and never really did. i have too much stuff, and i never seem to stop buying. and it's got to stop. my life and my heart and my house are becoming cluttered with so much "stuff" that i can't hardly see the light, the goodness, the simplicity that is sitting with God and soaking him in. reading and reflecting on that book really got me thinking of things i can do to ramp it down, step back and get rid of. i feel like i can't ever have enough stuff. i am beginning to think that my heart needs work too. do i have a greatful heart? am i truly thankful for the blessings we have: good jobs, a roof over our heads, groceries in the pantry, cars to drive, clothes to wear? or am i too caught up with the need to buy new things, have new clothes to take the tags off of, new shampoo, new card making things, a new book, new shoes? what is my heart: blessed, or greedy?

and what is my motivation for buying so much for other people? i know that one of my love languages is gifts, how i show i love people is by blessing them with things. but that's just it... they are just things. and is it really generosity that spurs me to buy things to send to my friends? is it truly a selfless, thoughtfull spirit? or is it a prideful, showing off, doing it for the thanks spirit? have i been hiding behind my "love language"; is it just another excuse to go shopping and buy more things?

what does simplicity look like? what does simplicity feel like? are my activities helping me love God more fully and bring more glory to him? what needs to change? "...i keep thinking about it, and how much i walk around with, about how life is a dance and God just meant for us to enjoy life...... it just seems like life would be better if we could just let go of the thought we need more and more stuff to be happy, more and more of the approval of others...." --don miller

2 comments:

Heather said...

good thoughts carly.. challenging. but sometimes we are too hard on ourselves... just remember that. you are so special and i for one feel loved every time a special package comes in the mail for me your thoughfulness in not only in the fact you sent me a gift but you make it so personal.. thats love. its pretty.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for posting this. It is so deep in your heart, yet you chose to share it with us. Like Heather, I feel so blessed when I get a Carly Care Package. It's less what is in the package, and more that I know you thought about me and love me. I really encourage you to continue meditating on this and try to come to the "real answer". I know you can do it, although it may be difficult. Please, please call me when you need to talk. (And I'm a Verizon customer now, so no more minute-issues!) Somehow I just lack the ability to pick up the phone and dial. But I miss you more than ever. I love you my darling.