friday five

top five things i'm looking forward to for the summer
1) getting our yard landscaped!!!! omg, i'm so excited to get it done!! it's been a wish list project since we bought the house. "ground breaking" is on friday. our whole yard will be torn up, sprinkler system installed and we'll lay sod. hopefully we have some friends we can count on to help us instal the sod so we can save some moolah!

2) HeavenFest at the end of july! it'll be the third year we'll go. it's always such a fun time, great bands and amazing music in the colorado sunshine. we are still debating on bringing levi or not, but either way it should be fun.

3) alberda family reunion in montana in august. it's always so good to see our huge extended family, relax in the sunshine and get to introduce levi to everyone. that will also be our third trip up to montana, and probably our longest one. it'll be another long drive through wyoming, but we'll probably be up there for a couple weeks, and levi and i will be up their longer and just fly home (probably) so we'll get to spend lots of good time with all the people we have to see up there. good family and friend time, for sure!

4) more rockies games, camping (hopefully!), bike rides, concerts, fireworks, my birthday, swimming, picnics, laying in the grass, iced tea, flip flops, sunshine, green grass, blue skies and bbqs.

5) JUNE 14th. not only is that my sisters birthday (and i'm hoping she'll come visit around there) but i have a BIG announcement to make..... and that'll be the day i make it. please stay tuned to my blog for more information and the upcoming announcement..... i'm counting on all of my followers and friends to make this project a success!!!

montana

we took another trip to montana, we just got back this evening. both boys are in bed (levi for good, mat to prepare for his audit shift tonight) and i'm snuggly on the couch, catching up on the online world (aka: facebook and blogs :) i am amazed at what a good traveller levi is. we drove for 12 hours to get up to bozeman on wednesday, then three hours up to missoula on friday, back to bozeman on sunday and back home today. we spent over 26 hours of our trip in the car, and he rocked it! he had a few moments, but overall he does so good. the sooner we get him used to it, the better i figure! we'll be coming back probably twice more this year....he'll be an old pro in no time!

all the grandparents loved seeing him, and he got to meet his great grandma nancy and great bumpa (mat's dad's parents) which was great! auntie katie graduated from U of M, he was a trooper spending most of saturday out in the sun being passed from relative to relative. he did take a snuggly little nap on me during most of the ceremony, which was wonderful, but a little toasty roasty and sweaty :)

CONGRATULATIONS AUNT KATIE!!!!!

dear levi: month 5

Dear Levi,
Where did my baby boy go? I have a little boy on my hands now. Your dad and I were just talking about how much you have changed over the last month. You are now holding up your head so good, so aware of everything and everyone around you. You are starting to get a little stranger/seperation anxiety....which means we'll start putting you in the nursery at church soon. You are the sweetest little nugget when you are in my arms and you look up at me in surprise, like you forgot I was holding you. And the noises you are making are amazing. You screech and squeal and shriek in delight, sometimes even closing your eyes to get that extra oomph of energy. Even when you are in the back of the car all by yourself, you still chatter up a storm to your Sophie. You are an amazing little boy, and I'm so lucky to be your mom. I can't wait to start feeding you "real" food soon, helping you learn to sit up, and hearing you use your voice even more. I pray for you every day, that you will be a healthy little boy with strong muscles and a loud voice.
You are amazing. Thanks for letting me be your mom. I love you,
Momma

first friday five

in an effort to post more often, i want to write some regular posts with somewhat of a theme. introducing, friday five. it'll be a short way to give anyone who reads this a little peek into my head on any given week. and one list that's been bouncing around in my head this week is.....

5 moms i NEVER thought i'd be:

1) i vowed i would NEVER be the mom of a thumb sucker. as someone who sucked her thumb until second grade, and had the jacked up teeth to prove it, i swore i would never let my child suck his (or her) thumb. i tried my darndest to get levi to take a pluggie.....but to no avail. last week i just finally gave up. he had reached the point that he would pull it out seconds after i stuffed it into his yapper, and stare at it like "what the heck mom?" then little thumbkin would once again reside in his mouth. and.......he's so stinking cute when he sucks it, especially when his pointer hooks over his nose

2) i honestly never anticipated being a stay at home mom. until i got pregnant and the possibility was looming, i just kinda had in the back of my mind that i'd still work, if even part time. especially with me going to school and pursuing my "career", i just thought i'd keep working. but, at the same time i knew day care wasn't really something for us. not sure how i thought that would work, but that's what was in my mind. NOW.....i can't imagine not spending all day with levi. some days are a little crazy and long and even a little frustrating, but, as my last post illustrated, he's capable of melting my heart and putting everything into perspective with just a simple giggle or slobbery formula-breath kiss. man alive i love that little boy.

3) i NEVER thought i would be a cloth diapering mom. NEVER. EVER EVER. but now, i love it. i'm so sick of the part time disposable diapering we've been doing. it seems like every time i put levi in a disposable, his little bummy gets all rashy and red.......it's ridiculous! i'm even giving nighttime diapering another try tonight (hopefully the punky doesn't wake up in a puddle again....) i don't mind washing them, drying them..... and every time we don't use a disposable it saves us that many cents :)

4) i NEVER thought i'd be a mom who's favorite smell is formula breath. is that gross? i love his little slobbery kisses, and his sweet milky breath. i feel like it will all change when he starts eating real food, so i'll enjoy every whiff while i can

5) i NEVER thought i'd be a creeper mom who hovers over his crib as he sleeps, who bends over backwards to make him happy, who doesn't mind picking noses or being slobbered or drooled on, washing the afforementioned cloth diapers, cuddling his little naked self even if it means being peed on, who is working so hard to make mommy friends so that he'll have friends when he gets older. i guess that's what it means to be a mom. i can't believe how much room i had in my heart, how much i would love him after even 5 short minutes, let alone 5 months. amazing

melty

i had the best afternoon with this little boy. it wasn't even the whole afternoon.....i had the best 20 minutes snuggling with him. i was reclining on our chairs upstairs, with my feet on the ottoman and he was sitting on my lap. we sang "itsy bitsy spider" and "patty cake" and snuggled and giggled. then he got a little "ready for nap" acting, so i put him on his tummy on my chest. he would burrow his head down into my chest, then pop his head up as if to say "peek-a-boo" (another new favorite). he would giggle and smile and generally melt my heart.

those tender moments before his nap made me realize how lucky i am to get to spend all day with him. even the rough days, his little giggle and smile helps me through them. it also makes me realize how much time i spend wasting and NOT playing with him throughout the day. it's so easy to just lay him on his playmat and let him do his own thing, especially when he's this little. but these moments are so fleeting....he's already growing up so fast, that i now know i need to work at making more of an effort to really spend time WITH him, not just next to him or in the same room.... but WITH him.

so many things need to change.... it's intimidating to make a million changes all at once, so i'll start making small changes. less online time. more real life time.

{not} wordless wednesday

i can't NOT write anything about this picture...... WHERE did my baby go?

for crying out loud, he's drinking out of a sippy cup {mostly}, he's eating rice cereal, he's sleeping through the night {again}, he's wearing tennis shoes..... yesterday i dressed him in a polo shirt and his little brown pants. he looked like such a little boy it took my breath away.

he's amazing. i love watching him grow up, although it's already happening too fast!!!!

wordless wednesday

some days i wish i had a boss

i need someone supervising me, making sure i'm doing a good job with this little one. telling me when to take him to the doctor, what's wrong with him, why he has diaper rash, why his eye is gunky and he's coughing and snotty and cranky...... it's hard for me to spend the whole day being my own boss, making the decisions and hoping i'm doing what is best for him. i begin to doubt what i'm doing and how i'm doing it, worried i'm doing him a disservice or something that isn't the best for him. it's a life i'm in charge of now....it's intimidating

wordless wednesday

dear levi: months 1-4

my dear little monkey. you are the apple of my eye. i had no idea how much my life would change in the last four months. my life changed before you were even born, but it has changed so much more since then. you give me more joy, belly laughs and quiet tears in my eyes than anyone else. i could peek in your room and watch you sleep all day long. the twinkle in your eyes is so bright and innocent; your laughter is my new favorite sound. you are growing up too fast already, i want to slow you down. i love watching you figure things out, watching you watch your hands move, your face in a mirror, your feet kick around. you are learning and discovering every day and i love being with you to see it. however, i can't help but think about what your future holds. trying "real" food, rolling over, crawling, teething, walking, running, skinning your knees, jumping in mud puddles, talking, going to more baseball games with your daddy. i can't wait to watch you grow up and into the young man God has created you to be. my heart overflows with all the good things he has in store for you. just like the verse i painted over your crib, He knows the plans he has for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, to give you hope and a future." just as i've been watching you grow and mature over the past four months, i will continue to be there for you, every day. i will pick you up and snuggle you when you cry, i will wipe away your alligator tears, i will feed you, both the food that will nourish your body, as well as the food that will nourish your soul, i will hold your hand in public for as long as you'll let me, and always in my heart. you are a special little boy. i love you more than you know.

love, momma

catching up

i wrote a whole bunch of nonsense, and it all deleted it..... i'll write a longer post this afternoon. now, here are some pictures from our trip :) enjoy

new mercies

aye yi yi this was a long weekend!!!
most people are sad the weekend is ending and it's never long enough, but this one was so long and trying. levi is sick....stuff nose, (slightly adorable) cough, diaper rash up to his armpits (nearly), possibly a slight fever....and who knows what else is bothering him that he can't vocalize. and mat's out of town (at the GM conference, which means he got the promotion!! yay!). either of those situations would be difficult on their own, but put together and it makes for one sad mama. i shed more than a few tears today, for having to do this alone, for having a sick baby, for not knowing what he needs or why he won't nap or how to make his bum less rashy, for not having any good adult interaction since friday, for feeling like i'm drowning. it's been a long tough weekend, but as my little stuffy-lumpagus sleeps in his crib, and as i head off to bed, i'm thankful that His mercies are new every morning. and that He will refresh and re-energize me, give me stregth to face another day. and that the sooner i fall asleep, the faster that new morning will come.

nesting....again?

i feel like i'm pregnant again. the power went out yesterday afternoon, and sadly enough....without tv or internet i was bored out of my mind. so i started cleaning. i scrubbed the kitchen counters, the stove, the microwave.......i also cleaned out some drawers and the utensil jar on the counter. which brings me to this picture:

seriously, how many utensils do i need? really, do i need eleventy spatulas? and nineteen scrapers? it was ridiculous. i thinned it way out, thank goodness. which, in a sentence, summarizes what has been going on here over the past few months. now that i'm spending a good chunk of my days at home, i'm realizing how much stuff we have everywhere. i don't think i ever throw a magazine away. or a wooden spoon. or spatula. or pair of old flip flops. or stained white shirt. i'm bringing two bags of magazines to the library tomorrow. i have 8 garbage bags of clothes, shoes, belts, purses to bring to platos closet. i'm starting a box (or seven) for a garage sale this summer. just trying to thin things out. get rid of the clothes that i don't wear anymore...the shoes that hurt my feet every time i wear them... the books i've read and won't read again....the things in the house that i don't really LOVE or that aren't enriching our lives. it's a slow process, done mostly during nap times, but it's really helping me see that i don't really need 22 sweatshirts and the back issues of SELF for the past three years. simplifying...refreshing

wordess wednesday

thunder thighs

i thought it was about time for another real post. i've been doing a lot of wordless wednesday's, simply because they are a quick and easy post, and because my little monkey is so stinking adorable. i know, i know, i'm a little biased, but i still think he's amazing. he's been sleeping for 11 hours at night, consistently for a couple weeks now. it's amazing. he goes down for the night at about 8, and then is up around 6:30 or 7. he's a rockstar. and bathtimes are going so much better, he loves his baths. about the only thing that ticks him off is getting dressed, especially if something is over his head. i try to jam his flailing little arms through the sleeves as quickly as i can.....as soon as it's all over, he's all smiles. i just love him and his chubby cheeks, double chin and thunder thighs. some days it just takes my breath away how much i love him. he's amazing.
staying at home has been really good. it's been hard work getting on a routine, more for me than for him it seems like. more often than not, the day.....or week....would go by and i'll wonder what i've gotten done. i wrote down (because i'm such a list person) a schedule of cleaning for the week, so that our house will be somewhat consistently clean.... other than that, i'm just relishing the opportunity that we have for me to be home with levi. we play and laugh and just have fun together.
we've also been trying to get out at least once a day, just to either run some errands, or to meet up with other kiddos or moms. we've been going to the new mom's group at the hospital, which has been good. this week it was about baby sign language, which was fun and interesting. definitely something we'll try to start with levi in a few months. we've also been going to storytime at the library with our neighbors. the storytime we've been going to is actually for older kids, but it's fun to go with melanie and her kids. sometimes levi sleeps the whole time, sometimes he's awake and just looks around. i try to sing along with the songs and do the motions with his little arms....that usually brings on the giggles. such a sweetheart. :)
i think he's awake from his nap...hopefully in time for a walk :)

wordless wednesday

happy valentines day

Happy Valentine's Day from my monkey. Levi and I were going to try to get to church, but we have about 5 inches of snow on the ground, and it's still snowing. So we are going to have another snuggly, pj snow day watching the Olympics, Daytona 500 and then Amazing Race. Nice lazy day with the two boys I love the most. Hope you all have a great day!

wordless wednesday

wordless wednesday

reflections on 8 weeks

• everyone tells you to prepare for tons more laundry when you have a baby. no one mentions that most of that laundry is YOURS that has been peed on, pooped on, spit up/thrown up/drooled on, other mystery fluids leaked on....
• it's amazing how far through the day you can make it before you go.... "huh, i don't think i ate breakfast this morning"
• as soon as you sit down to eat dinner, you will hear wailing from the babe
• it will hurt to do anything for a while. i never really thought about it, especially considering what labor involves. maybe i was in denial, but i vastly underestimated how much pain i would be in and for how long i would ache. ouchie
• about 18 trips up and down the stairs a day will become normal. as will juggling a crying baby, a bottle or two, a burp cloth, and maybe even a water bottle
• eventually, making a bottle at 2am will become second nature.....something you can almost do with your eyes closed
• the hospital will charge you for everything. would you like a prenatal vitamin? ka-ching $3.50 would you like a pain killer? ka-ching $3.00 would you like a microscopic tube of lanolin? ka-ching $42
• a refound belly button and ability to wear a wedding ring is better than a nice piece of dark chocolate.
• the body can function without caffiene.......just not very well
• one grin, giggle, spit bubble or cuddle with him makes everything.....everything worth it. i never knew how empty my life was until he came into it.